Coffee. The nectar of the gods. The drink that gives us life. The liquid gold that keeps us going. And a fourth thing.
Some would say that coffee is the most important discovery since fire. And hey, it's not my place to argue with them.
We can't function without it.
It's our lifeblood.
And yet, there are some people (we'll call them "liars") who would suggest that coffee is the root of our unwanted weight gain. That beneath its rich, aromatic surface, it's actually an insidious drink that secretly makes us gain weight when and where we're least expecting it.
Look, I'll admit coffee is a lot of things. It's delicious. It's hot. It makes us pee a lot.
But does coffee "make you fat"?
Absolutely not.
I mean, if "coffee" is your way of saying "a venti salted caramel Frappuccino from Starbucks with extra whip" then, yes, drinking that every day is probably going to make you gain a few pounds.
(I could've written this with a really alarmist title about how "coffee is secretly making us all fat and no one is talking about it and we need to talk about it," but that's just not my style, most of the time. Plus, it's not true, so there's also that.)
If you're talking about a cup of black coffee, then no, it's not going to make you fat. In fact, coffee can actually help you lose weight.
Coffee has been shown again and again to boost your metabolism, and when your metabolism is working faster, you're burning more calories--promoting weight, BMI, and body fat reduction.
Furthermore, when you have more energy, which caffeine tends to give you, you're more likely to be active and get your heart rate up, which also helps you burn more calories.
Go ahead and enjoy that coffee, guilt-free. Just don't go overboard with the cream. Or sugar. Or butter.
If you're worried about weight gain, try to slowly cut out the sugar and/or use a healthier coffee creamer.
A little unsweetened almond milk never hurt any--well, that's not true at all. Some people have nut allergies.
Look, I'm just suggesting that there's a difference between dumping a bunch of sticky flavored sugar (sugar that's measured in "pumps") into a big cup of whole milk that also happens to have some coffee in it somewhere--and enjoying a cup of freshly brewed coffee with a splash of unsweetened milk.
The bottom line is that coffee, in and of itself, isn't going to make you fat. But like with anything else, if you overdo the cream and sugar, you might start to see some unwanted weight gain. So just be mindful of what you're adding to that mug.
In Glorious Summation
So, to sum up: coffee will not make you fat, but if you're using it as an excuse to drink a sugary, calorie-laden beverage every day, then you might want to rethink that particular strategy.
(Is there some new doctor on daytime TV I don't know about who's been saying the opposite? Seriously, why do people think black coffee would make you gain weight?)
If you're trying to stay at your current weight, or lose weight, go ahead and enjoy that cup of joe without worry! That joe might even help you shed a few pounds. Which is more than I can say for that salted caramel Frappuccino with extra whip.
And if you take your coffee with half and half and some refined sugar, keep drinking it that way. Who cares? Live your best life.
Remember that just about everything is fine in moderation. Except maybe Pete Davidson. He's on TV too much.
And haggis. I've always thought there was something off about haggis. But that's neither here nor there. It’s in Scotland.
Anyway, coffee doesn’t make you gain weight. Bye!
